An LGBT concert of writers and composers by the Playground Ensemble, with three works by LGBT authors and the composers.

Fragments @ Invisible City (by Mirriam & Nathan Hall)

Fragments (lyrics)

We have a story in my family. My brother is young, nursing his favorite doll. He says I’m going to be a mommy when I grow up! Mom is proud but corrects him –  boys grow up to be daddies.

He sets down the doll, and never picks it back up. Cis doesn’t mean simple, he tells me now, a father of two. I keep my dolls much later in life, their unexpected aunt.

I never felt like a girl. What do girls feel like? I didn’t always know, and dream of wearing dresses. I wasn’t consistent, insistent, or persistent. I was frustrated.

A friend asks me what it means to be a woman. I have no idea. What does it mean for you to be your gender?

Hanson is on the radio.
Why is Hanson on the radio?

If I had a story like that, maybe everything would make sense. Maybe I could string this together into a narrative: beginning, middle, and end. Life doesn’t work that way.

A visiting trans friend asks where I get my Testosterone. I make it inside my body, I tell him. I’d give it to you if I could.

Hormones are slow magic.

In my dreams, I’m transgender.
In the mirror, I’m uncertain.
In public, I’m a woman.

In Colorado, your chosen name has to sue your given name for the right to exist.

I don’t get to put all the pieces together. “Passing” is not something I do, but something that happens to me — not a way of presenting, but a way of being seen. Fickle. In a single moment I can be seen and not seen, gendered and misgendered. Ungendered, and undressed.

I don’t believe in authenticity, but I do believe in pain, and doing something to survive it.

Trying on clothes to see if they fit is way better than trying on clothes to see if your gender fits. I didn’t know there was a difference, until everything changed.

I can finally hate my body for the normal reasons.

music’ orgs

Teacup Gorilla

Bass & Vocals: Dark indie-rock soundscapes with evocative poetry

Ersatz Robots

Bass: Trans-femme 90’s-alt sad-girl rock

Raven Jane

Multi-Instrumetalist: indie roots-rock featuring Rachel Eisenstat

Dirt Circle Dogs

Multi-Instrumetalist: Blues-inflected bright/dark music

96 ‘music’ episodes

2019

Last Bullet @ Seventh Circle Sessions

| music video

live-filmed music video

A Dark Plain @ Seventh Circle Sessions

| music video

live-filmed music video

2018

Teacup Gorilla @ Ross-Cherry Creek Library

| music | Denver, CO

Not the UMS @ Remixed Gifts

| music | Denver, CO

Speaking of PrideInvisible City

| music | Denver, CO

An LGBT concert of writers and composers by the Playground Ensemble, with three works by LGBT authors and the composers.

JANE/EYRE @ The Bakery

| theater

We are not here to flatter egotism, or prop up humbug; we are merely telling the [queer] story. We value what is good in the book; but we believe in the existence of other, and more vivid kinds of goodness.

2017

Teacup Gorilla @ 7th Circle Music Collective

| music | Denver, CO

Teacup Gorilla @ Syntax Physic Opera

| music | Denver, CO

Anti-UMS Fest @ 1010 Workshop

| music | Denver, CO

ACLU Benefit @ The Bakery

| music | Denver, CO

2016

Teacup Gorilla @ Syntax Physic Opera

| music | Denver, CO

Underground Music Showcase @ Illegal Pete’s

| music

Founded in 2001, The UMS is an annual three-day celebration of music featuring hundreds of bands across multiple venues.

MoonConf @ Galvanize Boulder

| music | Boulder, CO

Teacup Gorilla @ The Squire Lounge

| music | Denver, CO

Teacup Gorilla @ 7th Circle Music Collective

| music | Denver, CO

Teacup Gorilla @ 7th Circle Music Collective

| music | Denver, CO

2015

Species of the Stars @ The Bakery

| music video | Denver, CO

We’re excited to be part of the single release for Species of the Stars by our good friends Open to the Hound!

EP Release Party @ Hi Dive

| album | Denver, CO

Teacup Gorilla’s debut album

Departure Tour @ Tennyson’s Tap

| music | Denver, CO

Teacup Gorilla @ G***y House Cafe

| music | Denver, CO

Teacup Gorilla @ Merchant’s Mile High Saloon

| music | Denver, CO

2014

Teacup Gorilla @ Pikes Peak Brewing Co.

| music | Monument, CO

Teacup Gorilla @ Pikes Peak Brewing Co.

| music | Monument, CO

Queen City Magnetic @ BandCamp

| album

Not our album, but we did write a few of the songs…

2013

Teacup Gorilla @ Herman’s Hideaway

| music | Denver, CO

2012

2010

Raven Jane @ BandCamp

| org

For a few years, Teacup Gorilla performed & recorded music with Rachel Eisenstat – initially as Iron City, and later as Raven Jane.

Iron City @ BandCamp

| album

For a few years, Teacup Gorilla performed & recorded music with Rachel Eisenstat – initially as Iron City, and later as Raven Jane.

Fundraiser @ The Packing House

| music | Denver, CO

Missa Populi @ PackingHouse Center for the Arts

| theater

Combining the sacrifice, transcendence, blood, and circumstance of the Catholic Mass with history, live music, science, dance, literature, and pop culture to find a wholly modern communion experience. What we have left is our selves, broken and battered, but surviving together.

2009

2007